How to Give a Male Stripper Femdom Lapdance

Let’s talk about how to give a male stripper femdom lapdance! i.e. How can a masculine-identifying person give an erotic dance that will arouse and seduce their femdom partner?

Despite all of the “women don’t find appearances as sexual” stereotypes out there, there are a whole lot of femdoms out there who absolutely love a hot visual. Just look at the Magic Mike or Fifty Shades of Grey franchises; despite what society says about women not being visual, the evidence is regularly shown to be to the contrary.

So, if you’re thinking about flipping the tables on the traditional “woman gives lapdance to seduce a man” trope, let’s talk about how to give a male stripper femdom lapdance. Not only can this be a fun way to experience things from the other side, but it can be a great form of foreplay.

There’s also a lot of objectification involved in a lapdance – and that’s not necessarily a bad thing! For the entirety of your routine, the submissive exists to be looked at – and lusted over – as they “seduce” the dominant partner. That can scratch the itch for a lot of subs.

A Good Lap Dance is a Time Commitment

First off: this is a time commitment.

This isn’t going to be like other “kinky foreplay ideas” that only take a few minutes (or a single purchase) to bring everything into existence.

Especially if you’ve never given a lapdance, this will require gaining some confidence in yourself, time to practice your lapdance moves, time to craft and/or memorize your routine, and time to really figure out what your lapdance will look like.

If you’re trying to do this to prep for a special occasion or to give as a gift, plan for at least a few months of regular, at-least-twice-a-week practice.

On the bright side, as you start to really learn the moves and throw some effort into them, these “sessions” can start to function as light cardio days – so you can replace your workout for the day and save a bit of time.

There’s always more you can do with it (gaining flexibility, adding strength, learning new moves, learning longer routines), but there’s a whole lot of fun you can have with some of the basics: just make sure you take the time commitment seriously before deciding to go down this path.

Really, a male stripper femdom lapdance is accessible to almost everyone out there regardless of skill level: you just need to make sure you put in the time to gain the confidence you’ll need (and want!) and memorize the moves you’ll need to do a good job. Even if you stay seated the entire time (and learn to utilize your arms and/or legs in different positions), you can craft an entire dance to surprise your partner.

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Ask Your Femdom’s Lapdance Preferences

Regardless of your gender, there are different ways you can “play” a standard male stripper femdom lapdance. This has nothing to do with what’s in your pants and perceived gender – and more to do with how you move your body.

See, lots of “masculine” stripper movements are all about accentuating hip thrusts; it’s all about simulating the in-and-out movement of intercourse – and a lot of moves showcase broader, strong shoulders.

On the other hand, lots of “feminine” stripper movements are all about accentuating hip movements to simulate riding or grinding against someone. At the same time, many “feminine” stripper movements also accentuate or shake the breasts (whether larger or smaller!). Pointed toes and long, flowing lines are also pretty common in feminine choreographies.

Regardless of your body or how you look, you can lean into either option – or pick bits and pieces from both.

While your personal preferences are a big part here, I also recommend talking to your femdom about their preferences. Your femdom might find it uncomfortable to have you grinding up on her like a standard male stripper – especially if “standard” heterosexual intercourse isn’t generally on the table for the two of you. Or they’ll find it hotter than hell and will enjoy twisting it into a sex-denial scenario.

Especially if pegging is something you’re both really into, your femdom might really enjoy the visual of you rolling your hips on their lap. If that’s something the two of you don’t really explore, though, it might be a bit weird for them.

So, start with your own personal preferences – but then check in with your dominant partner to see what would appeal most to them. While giving a male stripper femdom dance is primarily about how the experience makes you feel, you presumably want this to be a great gift for the receiver too – or else you’d simply be doing this by yourself with no intention to share it.

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Think About Your Femdom’s Involvement

A “standard” strip routine is all about “look but don’t touch”. This dynamic can really place the striptease giver in a dominant role over the striptease receiver. If you’re getting really kinky, some striptease recipients may be tied up to really ensure they don’t touch.

That may (or may not!) be the feeling you’re going for when your dominant femdom is the one receiving the lap dance.

Some femdom striptease games you can play to keep the femdom power exchange role at the forefront of your interaction:

• Give the femdom play money. She’s encouraged to tip you as you do a good job – and you “earn” something if you hit a certain threshold.
• Explore your money kink by including real money within your male stripper femdom lapdance. At the end of your “shift”, you give all of the money right back to her. Play this up as much as you’d like.
• Start by giving a femdom striptease – and end your dance by spreading her legs and providing oral sex; make it clear everything was about her.
• End your lapdance with floorwork – and find yourself in the perfect spot to give her a foot massage.
• Start off your dance by handing her a riding crop – and add a few places in your song where a swat on your ass is encouraged.
• If you’re really confident in your freestyling skills, let her choose the music – and you’ll be doing a dance to some of her favorite music. (Depending on your femdom’s personality, this can also end up in laughter until you can’t breathe if she chooses something ridiculous.)
• Depending on your dynamic, you may hand your femdom a sex toy of their preference – and encourage them to pleasure themselves as you become their own personal pornography. Not only can this be hot foreplay, but it can also be a really great set-up for an orgasm denial scenario too.
• Craft an entire elaborate roleplay out of the male stripper femdom dance. She’s the client you need to impress for the evening – and you’re the dancer. Keep her glass full of her favorite drink – and keep it looking sexy while you do. Become a brilliant conversationalist to keep her engaged – and be constantly aware of your sexuality and body language throughout the entire scene while encouraging her to want to “spend more” with you.

Think about their position as well. Do you want your femdom to sit on a chair that can be straddled (like a standard lapdance)? You can get an entirely different vibe if your femdom lays back on the bed – and casually enjoys your dance like it’s a private bedroom show just for them.

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Practice A Male Stripper Femdom Routine

There are a couple of ways you can go about formulating your male stripper femdom dance routine. You can:

• Freestyle the entire performance (no planning ahead)
• Practice some erotic moves – then freestyle the entire performance with those in mind
• Plan a light choreography but add in things that feel natural
• Memorize a full choreography from start to finish

You can really work with any of these options. I’d imagine the full “freestyle” options won’t be comfortable ideas unless you have a dance background – or are very confident – but since the endgame is to give an erotic show, any of them will work.

I, personally, suggest hitting the sweet spot in the middle.

Find a song that makes you feel sexy – and see if there are YouTube videos out there with full choreography tutorials you can master. If there are, yay! You’re in luck! Practice with some of those – and swap out anything that doesn’t feel right.

If there aren’t any “pre-made” choreographies out there you love, I recommend planning out your own choreography to your own favorite song. You don’t need to be too detailed; just know where hard hits in the music happen, when things slow down, and when things speed up. Have a general idea of the type of moves you’d like to include.

Regardless of whether you found a pre-made choreography, I also recommend researching a few videos (like the ones I’ll include below) with a few go-to moves. This way, you’ll have something comfortable to fall back on if you’re otherwise at a loss or forget what happened next in your premade choreography.

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Build Anticipation for your Male Stripper Femdom Routine

If you start looking at erotic dance routines on YouTube and pay attention to the timestamps, you’re going to notice one thing:

It might be a good 30 seconds or minute into the song before the dancer actually does a trick or fancy move.

As most songs are already in the 3-minute realm, you can use this to your advantage – and you should.

Practice an erotic walk. Get comfortable bending over and showcasing the areas you want to showcase. Watch yourself in the mirror as you slowly draw your hands over some of your favorite body parts. Slowly. Yes, even more slowly than that. Drag your toes along the ground in a sensual way. Grind your hips against the air.

Use up even more time by having clothing and accessories you can sensually remove or play with.

The entire song can seem foreboding when you’re thinking about needing 3 minutes of beautiful tricks to do. It can seem less foreboding when you fill up a full minute just walking around and feeling yourself.

Honestly, put on a song, and practice doing these light, easy things in front of a mirror. Eyefuck yourself. Walk around and wiggle your booty. Grind your hips. Sensually remove an item of clothing. Run your hands up and down your body. Place your hands on parts of your body and drag them sensually to other parts of your body. I’d guess you’re going to find yourself surprised by how quickly those 3 minutes are over.

That’s it, though! Just toss in a few fancy tricks, add some touching of your partner, and bam: you have everything you need to do a male stripper femdom lapdance.

Remember: a male stripper femdom routine – and any erotic lapdance – is all about the anticipation and tease. Use that to your advantage.

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Practice a Routine in the Mirror – and Film It

Now that you’ve practiced your “ideal” male stripper femdom dance moves, it’s time to start getting ready for showtime.

Practice your routine in front of a large mirror – and see how you can add hardness (or softness, depending on your desired effect) to the movements. Can you pop your booty more? Is there a place to flex your muscles better? Could something look more – or less – fluid or graceful – depending on what you’re going for?

Next, film your entire choreography. Not only can this help you see your movements from a different angle, but this can be a great way to see what your femdom partner will see: they’ll, presumably, be stationed in one spot, and the camera only sees one view. Make more modifications to your routine as needed.

(And hey, if you’re the type that likes to send a tease, I highly recommend making a short video or GIF out of a small part of your filmed choreography and sending it ahead of time to tease your dominant partner!)

Depending on how close you are to your friends, you also could ask a friend to “receive” the lapdance and give feedback. Not only will this help you get over any first-time jitters performing for a live person, but it also can make the entire experience feel a little more lighthearted (and less serious!) when you both burst into fits of laughter.

If you’re uncomfortable with the idea of performing such an intimate dance for a friend, you also could consider a stranger online as well. Connecting with someone over bondage cams or other camsites could give you a captive audience to practice with.

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Wear Something Hot

What makes you feel confident? What makes you feel hot? While every male stripper lapdance in existence seems to show someone in snug jeans and shirtless, that may not be what feels comfortable for your male stripper femdom dance – and that’s okay!

Would you feel hotter in men’s lingerie? Go with that. Would you feel better in your boxer briefs – and a fishnet top to cover up more skin? Go with that.

The idea is to wear something that makes you feel confident because portraying confidence during your lapdance can completely transform the entire dance. Even if you nail every move of the choreography, if you do it while clearly uncomfortable, that will definitely come across.

So, wear something that makes you feel confident. It doesn’t matter what the “thing” is.

(That being said, make sure to try out your outfit ahead of your male stripper femdom dance. Especially with the bending and twisting that an erotic dance has, you might find that your clothing doesn’t allow you to do the thing you wanted to do. Especially try on heels ahead of time to get used to them; the last thing you need is a twisted ankle derailing your entire erotic show.)

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Have Her Wear a Strap-On

Do you both play with strap-on play? If so, adding a strap-on dildo to your male stripper femdom dance can be a really fun way to mix with gender roles.

Not only does this allow you, the striptease-giver, to have something to grind against, but when put into the right spot, this can help all of your movements directly translate to rubbing against their body. Getting clitoral pleasure to a vulva owner during a seated lapdance can be hard depending on the angle – but a strap-on dildo tucked into the right place can help bridge some of that gap.

If you go this route, I recommend leaving your femdom’s hands available to adjust the strap-on dildo if needed. While the dildo can feel erotic when grinding into the right spot, it can be painful if grinding into the wrong spot. Leaving your femdom’s hands free allows them to adjust and move the dildo around if things are going awry.

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Some Go-To Male Stripper Femdom Dance Moves

Entirely freestyling a striptease is hard if you aren’t in practice. Having smooth, erotic flow during a complete make-it-up-on-the-fly dance is something that takes dancers years to perfect. Instead, a lot of the routines you see that look as smooth as butter are memorized – and practiced – over and over until they hit the confident, flowy look you’re impressed by.

And the first step?

Learning some go-to male stripper femdom dance moves. Practice them. Practice them even more until they’re in your muscle memory. Watch how they look in the mirror – and make even further adjustments until you like how it looks.

Let me start you off with some helpful beginner videos to really get you started on your male stripper femdom journey:

Masculine Body Rolls and Dolphin Dive

Masculine Sexy “Walk”

3 Beginner, Masculine Lap-Dance-Specific Moves

Full Feminine Lap Dance Choreography to Learn

6 Feminine Sexy Dance Moves

5 Beginner, Feminine Lap-Dance-Specific Moves

Butt-Focused Chair Invert (A bit more advanced!)