You’re out to dinner. To the average bystander, you both just look like you’re on an adorable, romantic date. Some people might even think it’s a first date by how often you’re smiling and touching one another. Little do they know, you’ve taken advantage of some of my scene ideas for public femdom teasing.
There’s just something particularly erotic about public play. I could spend an entire article just talking about my own interest in it, but it mostly boils down to: it requires sexual tension. If you get horny at home, you probably touch your partner, and things move on to more. If you get horny in the middle of a restaurant, you’re forced to sit in it, amping up the energy even more as you’re unable to get any relief.
Mmmmph. That’s definitely high on my list of “hell yes, please!”
So, let me give you a ton of some of my favorite in public femdom ways to tease your submissive. This is written to be read by another lifestyle dominant, but if you’re a sub who wants to take this home to your own femdom for some inspiration, have at it.
As long as everyone consents, and you’re having a great time, yes please!
But First, a Warning
Public play is hot AF.
But it’s also, well, in public. This means that there are unsuspecting people around you. Those people are just trying to earn their hourly wage, make the miserable walk to work, or pick up groceries to feed their families at home. They want nothing to do with your sexual escapades, and they shouldn’t have any idea they’re going on.
Some light odd comments and behavior are okay. Ordering dinner for your submissive when the waiter comes over is weird but not sexually exposing. Having a dick out at the dinner table is a different matter. Leaving explicit images open on your phone that’s sitting on the table is also a no-go.
Please respect the everyday people who are just going about their lives while playing with public femdom scenes. Not only does this dramatically decrease your chances of going to jail, but it also makes you less of a dick. And we’re not here to be assholes; we’re here to have fun.
Now, onto the hot shit: Scenes for Public Femdom Teasing:
Make Them Read Erotica
Now, opening up loud porn videos or spread-eagle vulva pics in the middle of a restaurant is a no-go. But text… If they can read smaller fonts comfortably, well, they could just be reading a news article, now couldn’t they?
If you know your submissive will be waiting for you somewhere in public, I highly recommend sending them an erotic short story you expect them to read while they wait. This can be something you’ve written, or it can be something you’ve found online that piques your interest.
This can be a great way to “start” your public play scene as they’ll already be a bit amped up before you even arrive.
Even if you won’t be “arriving”, this can be a great assignment for times when you’re apart. For example, you can require your submissive to read the erotic story at work during their lunch break. This can help amp up their drive for later play.
Use Remote-Controlled Sex Toys
I’m not even sure this needs to be included on a list about public femdom teasing because it’s pretty much the “given” for public play adventures.
But a remote-controlled sex toy is quintessential public play. A sex toy does all of the work of handlessly stimulating your “victim” while you control the intensity and power.
This gets a little harder when your “victim” has a penis – especially if they aren’t into anal play. While there are quite a few remote-controlled butt plugs out there, remote-controlled penis toys are pretty rare.
(An aside: Remote-control public play penis toys REALLY aren’t that ready yet. There’s a big problem with making them work: in order for something to stay on the penis, it has to, well, not slide off. This means that it has to be snug enough to stay on. This can cause an erection – which isn’t necessarily bad – BUT if the sex toy is tight enough to cause an erection, that means you’re cutting off blood flow. This, then, means that you have a limited timespan to play with the toy before it’s dangerous PLUS your partner has to deal with an erection constantly in public.
This wouldn’t necessarily be a complete dealbreaker, but the only way companies have to fasten a vibrator onto the penis, hands-free, right now is by wrapping it around the base of the shaft. The base of the shaft is not the most sensitive part of the penis. So not only is there this limited timeframe for play, but the play you do is unlikely to cause orgasm.
So. Boo. That sucks.)
So you can choose to use one of the few remote-controlled penis toys out there with a limited timespan, or if your bottom is open to it, remote-controlled butt plugs are a rampant market and ready to go as soon as you are.
We pretty much play exclusively with b-Vibe toys (if we want a physical remote) or Lovense toys (if an app-controlled option is allowed). But there are lots of options out there.
Just make sure to be cognizant about “cheap” remote-controlled sex toys. The worst thing in the world, as a femdom, is when my bottom’s toy doesn’t actually respond to remote commands. It pisses me off, and we spend the whole time we’re out with me asking “Did it work?” over and over. It’s not sexy.
(That’s why I wrote an entire article about male sex toys for femdom remote control that actually work.)
So if the price seems too good to be true, it just might be. So shop smartly.
Use Penis Milking Toys
You don’t have to go entirely remote-controlled if you don’t want. In fact, using sex toys at home, like a penis milking machine, might be a better fit if you’re open to playing more at home.
Through technology, sex toys have gotten to a point where you can slide one of these penis milking machines onto the shaft, and the machine will do all of the work of the stroking up and down.
Spend the entire time in public teasing them about what awaits them when they get home. This can be a great way to amp up the intensity before you take them home. For bottoms who might be nervous about getting in social or legal trouble for odd behavior or loud vibrations, this can also be a happy middle ground. You tease them about what’s going to happen when they walk through the door when you get home, and they don’t have to necessarily worry about being “caught” outside.
For even more kink, add some bondage to your captive’s hands when using the milking machine to add even more power exchange elements, “forcing” them to submit to the gooning treatment you had in mind. (This can be a really good fit for some medfet elements too.)
Get VERY Specific with Time
I read this once in an erotica novel, and it has stuck with me since. In it, the femdom required her submissive to show up at 1:37PM. Not 1:30. Not 1:40. A very, very specific 1:37PM.
There’s nothing that says “I own you” like making you, quite literally, waste your time watching the clock to ensure something is done exactly to specification.
You can use this to your advantage for scene ideas for public femdom teasing too. This can be things like:
- Meet me at this spot by 1:37PM.
- Sure, you’re allowed to go pee, but I expect you in this seat at 1:37PM and not a minute earlier.
- The very last drop of that beer will be drank at 1:37PM. I expect you to pace yourself until then.
- Every last drop of that water should be drank by 1:37PM. I’m not waiting for you to hydrate yourself at your leisure.
- Go around this bookstore and find 3 books you think I’ll like to read. I’ll be sitting here in the in-store cafe with my coffee. I expect you back with your picks at 1:37PM.
- We may leave this parking lot at 1:37PM.
Bonus points if you want to add specific punishments if they do not meet the exact time that was specified.
Use Their Fetishes Against Them
What is your submissive into? Is it something you can actively “use” against them in your public femdom scene? If so, have a blast. ;)
Too vague? Okay, let me give you some specific examples:
- Foot fetishists: Get a pedicure done, and wear a pair of nice heels or pretty flats that show off your feet. Bonus points for simply slipping off your shoes and leaving your feet visible.
- Pajama pants fetishists: If you can get away with it, simply wear their favorite pajama pants in public. This probably won’t fly at a high-end restaurant, but if you wanna dress down at a Mall and your dignity allows it, have at it.
- Feeders: This is almost cheating. Simply eating a meal in front of them will do it – but feel free to use their favorite words and phrases to really emphasize how much you’re intentionally trying to turn them on with it.
Take Advantage of the Bathroom Stall
If you’re out and about, the one place that can be a kinky hideaway is the bathroom. A bathroom stall is generally considered a safe space to be naked, and this can make it a good spot for issuing more exposing commands.
Those commands might include things like heading to the bathroom to…
- Edge themselves 5 times.
- Look at an explicit photo you’re going to send them.
- Get themselves hard or wet to take a photo to send to you.
- Put in or take off a sex toy.
- Add lube to a chastity cage or sex toy that’s already in them and needs relubing.
If you’re a femdom, keep in mind that some men’s bathrooms are a world’s difference from what you might be used to. They’re usually pretty disgusting, and they may or may not have stall doors, depending on where you’re at.
If you’re asking someone to do something in a new locale, consider telling them to go “wash their hands” to scope out the bathroom situation and report back before choosing your command. A bathroom covered in poop is probably not the “kinky hideaway” you want for your submissive’s headspace.
(There are lots of negative things to be said about the treatment of non-binary individuals in United States bathrooms, so be careful doing anything kinky in bathrooms with someone who may already be raising alarm bells in the area where you live.)
Get Creative with Rope
One of the first public play kinky things most of us kinksters did in college was rope underneath clothing. It’s cheap AF. You simply get a skin-safe piece of rope, and you learn how to tie a basic body or chest harness. You can then toss it underneath a shirt or clothing for complete discretion!
Make sure to tie your harness a little looser than usual but not too loose. Readjusted ropes can end up in uncomfortable spots if they’re too loose, but if it’s too tight, it might cut into skin when moving around in everyday life.
If you’re going out to do something that requires sitting down, make sure you test your set-up by sitting down at home. Preferably, have the wearer sit down on a similar surface they’ll be in when they head out (a wooden chair vs a soft, plushy couch).
You don’t have to go super fancy here either. The significance is what makes the difference here. If you have a piece of pink ribbon at home, and you tell your partner that this is their temporary collar for the day as you tie it in a pretty bow around their wrist, that can mean just as much as tying an elaborate karada with expensive bondage rope. It’s all about the intent here. (Bonus points for this wrist ribbon as your partner will now be required to keep an eye on the ribbon to ensure it doesn’t untie itself!)
Use their Urine
Okay, this one is definitely more kinky than most of the options on this list, but it can be a really fun power play. There’s nothing that says “I’m going to do everything she tells me” quite like embarrassing yourself and making yourself uncomfortable on purpose.
Next time your submissive has to use the bathroom, command them to pee a bit in their own underwear. We’re not going for a full omorashi set-up here. We just want to make an uncomfortable wet patch that’s going to sit against their skin (without soaking their pants) the entire time they’re out. ;)
It’s a constant, invisible reminder of who gets to call the shots. (It isn’t them.)
Be careful if your submissive is sensitive to rashes or yeast infections. Being in damp/wet clothing for long periods of time can bring on both of those. If you’re just looking to keep them in it for another hour or so, though, this can be a pretty big power move.
Require Lewd Lingerie – or No Undies at All!
If your submissive is a crossdresser or otherwise loves lingerie, wearing lingerie might be a daily occurrence for them. If not, adding a bit of lingerie can be a surprisingly simple way to add some public femdom teasing.
Don’t think just panties either! I mean, if you wanna go with some cute undies, have at it, but that isn’t your only option – especially if your bottom is used to outfitting their privates in some luxurious.
Other options include:
- Wearing cheap, dollar-store pantyhose underneath their jeans and clothing. This has a very unique feel to it!
- Adding a garterbelt on top of undies but underneath clothing.
- Wearing a bra or sports bra underneath clothing. If you’re looking for full discretion, look for something cupless, padding-free, and flat. (Usually the cheap AF sports bras are exactly what you’re looking for.)
- Some potential for humiliation by forcing a penis-owning sub to wear a strap-on harness and dildo underneath their clothing. Bonus points if it’s a harder dildo that requires them to be very cognizant of how they’re positioned at all times.
Thanks for reading all of my public femdom scene ideas!
Updated: October 2025, July 2025, May 2025, February 2025.
