Welcome to my chastity femdom scene – a new addition to my BDSM Scenes, Step-by-Step series. Designed to be simple, BDSM scene outlines that you can follow, I’m here to break down the basics of the scene, the ideas behind it, why you might enjoy it, how to prepare for it, how to do it, what to say during it, and what safety concerns might pop up.
Essentially, if you’re nervous about doing something kinky, I’ve designed these to be the start-to-finish for an entire BDSM scene outline – you just have to add your own spin on it!
Why? Well, when I was a baby Domme, I remember being terrified going into any scene. Yeah, having this cute boy at my beck and call was hot, but it also came with responsibilities. He was here because he expected me to orchestrate this amazing scene and experience for him – and I’m still just a human who was swamped with college coursework, holding down a job, and constantly forgetting to call my Mom.
I remember scouring the internet for hours with various versions of “femdom scene outline” or “femdom scene plan” and other permutations. I was hoping SOMEONE had made something I could just follow – for days when I was exhausted and wanted fun, but I didn’t want to be the Dungeon Master of that experience that night.
And just like D&D campaigns have pre-built DM scenarios, you have your own tools: BDSM scene outlines – with a bit of help from me.
All that being said, these are YOUR scenes. If you want to follow things to the letter, do it. If you think something doesn’t sound hot, don’t do it. If you want to take entire sections of my ideas and replace them, do it. This is all about you and your partner. Use this to make it less stressful – and then use your own kinks to make it HOT.
Now, let’s get onto this chastity femdom scene outline:
This Scene Is…
A great primer if you’re not quite sure what to do with a chastity cage – or how to go about “involving” it in your kink life. Since chastity cages are pretty simple once they’re already locked on the body (they “prohibit” orgasm – the end), the biggest “scene” you have with it is putting it on and taking it off. That’s why this BDSM Scene Step by Step chastity femdom scene focuses on making a ritual out of putting on the chastity cage.
However, especially if you’re a femdom who’s new to chastity cages, you probably don’t know how to put one on – or may not be proficient in it. Because of this, I ensure this scene requires the sub to put on their own cage – with supervision, of course.
This chastity femdom scene focuses on getting the cage on – while simultaneously ensuring that the chastity wearer is the one doing most of the heavy lifting. Less mental stress and anxiety on the Femdom that way.
This chastity femdom scene solely focuses on putting the chastity cage onto the now-chaste partner. What you choose to do after the cage is on is up to you; you can move into other types of BDSM play or simply send them out on an errand to make you happy. It’s all up to you!
On that note, this scene is also designed for short-term – or long-term – chastity. Feel free to equip the chastity cage before a play scene – and let them out after the scene is done. You can also require them to stay in it for a few weeks after you’re done. It’s all about what you’re into – and how comfortable your orgasm cage is for wear.
This specific BDSM scene was written for a female dominant and a male submissive who is wearing a ball-trap chastity cage for penises. This is, statistically, the most-likely pairing for a chastity femdom scene. However, the genders can easily be mixed around for any genital set-up or gender identity for any couple. Just know your device – regardless of genitals!
Scene Is: Chastity play scene, Inspection Scene, Prelude to other play.
What Do You Need
- A chastity cage that fits your submissive person.
- Lube for that cage.
- One of the keys for that cage/lock. (the second set of keys should be in a secure, in-case-of-emergency location)
- (Optional) Bondage implements of choice (rope, bondage tape, cuffs, saran wrap, etc.)
- (Optional) Riding crop
Household Things to Have
- A sturdy chair a sub can be bound to. A dining chair is what I have in mind here, but any chair works.
As you can see, this is a pretty simple “scene” that takes minimal prepwork. This is because this chastity femdom scene is designed to be a prelude to any other kink activities you have in mind.
How Long Does It Take?
This ritualistic scene can be drawn out with teasing, anticipation, and lots of sensual touch – or it can be done in minutes. It’s entirely up to you.
At a bare minimum, I’d say to set out about 10 to 30 minutes to really settle into the power dynamic.
How Do You Prep for a Chastity Femdom Scene?
Do not try this with a chastity cage that neither of you has tried. This scene assumes that the sub has used this chastity cage on multiple previous occasions to work out the pain points of that particular model.
If neither of you have used the cage before, do some exploratory science before this scene. Take a non-sexualized time to experiment to figure out how it fits, how it works best with their anatomy, how much lube you need, how that cage goes on, how much lube you need, how it locks, and everything else.
You’re going to have a hard time keeping up a “commanding” persona during this chastity femdom scene if you’re both lost and struggling to find an online video to show you how your specific chastity cage model works.
So, for the success of this chastity scene, make sure the submissive person is proficient in using their cage and can put it on and off with minimal issue.
In addition, troubleshoot your preferred chair for this scene. Figure out where – and how – you can attach bondage implements to bind your partner to this chair. If you don’t have a lot of gear, I recommend saran wrap as it can bind virtually anything.
Step-by-Step Instructions
- “Talk up” their impending chastity as much as you’d like. As most chastity play kinksters know, a big part of chastity is the tease itself. Before you ever touch the device, you can talk about how you’ve been thinking about it or start leaving the keys in easy-to-view places. You can do this for weeks if you want. Feel free to be “vague” about when you’ll do this scene too – which leaves them constantly guessing about when they’re about to be locked up.
- When the day comes, I recommend wearing something that makes you feel sexy. It could be a nightgown; it could be latex. It’s totally a personal preference.
- (Optional) If you’re into shaved or trimmed pubic hair, make it a command that they need to shave or trim for “reasons” a few days before your intended chastity day. Avoid shaving day of. Especially if they’re new to chastity cage wear, freshly-shaven bits on someone who never shaves can make it extremely difficult to troubleshoot where the issues are as they arise.
- Give them a time where you expect them to present themselves for inspection. Be very specific about the time – and tell them what you expect.
- (Optional) Be intentionally vague. Do you want them to “look good for you”? That’s vague – which means you can find various “flaws” if you want to for later punishments. Would you prefer to punish for specific infractions that they’re supposed to actually avoid? Tell them what exact things are expected of them. (Shaved perfectly, Smelling good, Freshly showered, etc.)
- When it’s time, take the chastity cage in your hands and visually inspect it. Run your fingers long any hidden, internal bits, and feel free to take it slow to make it look as sensual as possible. (You’re checking to ensure there are no cracks or sharp edges, but if you want to make it look hot, have at it!)
- Command them to sit on your chosen chair. A riding crop can be a good, optional, tool here to tap them along if they’re not doing things quickly enough for your preference. Verbally tell them now you’d like their limbs placed for upcoming bondage as well.
- (Optional) If you prefer a sensual approach to this, get on your hands in knees in front of them, taking your time to tease them. An erotic lapdance is a good fit here if that’s your thing. Trail your fingers along their body – pushing their limbs into your preferred place as you go. For example, place your fingers along their hipbone and trail it to their knees. Once you get to their knees, firmly grip the knee and push the legs apart.
- Now that their limbs are in place, take out your bondage implement of choice – and restrain their ankles. You may choose to restrain their arms, temporarily, if you’d like, but remember: the end goal of requiring your submissive to put on their own cage will require their hands being unbound again.
- Offer a tease. What the “tease” is will vary based on your dynamic. Do you want them to recite a pledge to their devotion? Do you want to flog their thighs? Do you want to stroke or finger them and edge them before locking them up? Do you want to give them a back massage? Do you want to have intercourse with them – or make them hold a vibrator for you to orgasm on? Do you want to give them a lap dance? Whatever you feel like doing – and whatever honors your dynamic – can easily fit into this space.
- When you’re ready, hand the cage (without the lock!) over to the submissive. Adjust your position for the chastity femdom scene vibe you’re going for. Stand over them, threatening, if you’re going for a stern Mistress. If you’re going for an intimate, joint adventure, consider kneeling next to them.
- (Optional) Slather your submissive’s parts in lube. Depending on how long the cage will be on and how the submissive wears it for comfort, putting the cage on may require lube. You can ensure that they don’t enjoy the lubricating process too much by putting the lube on yourself – and enjoying whatever you want out of that activity. (You could even give them an orgasm right before they go into the cage. It’s up to you!)
- Command them to put the cage on themselves – and provide commands as they do so. Feel free to make up commands just to flaunt your power. Tell them to do it more slowly. Ask them to take it off then put it back on to “ensure it went on right”. Make them put on – and take off/adjust the chastity cage – as much as you want until you’re satisfied that it’s ready for the lock.
- With the chastity cage encasing their bits, take your time with the lock. Again, this is all about the tease. Visually inspect the lock. Dangle the keys in front of their face. Make them listen to the jingle. Kiss or lick the keys if that’s your jam. Before you slide that lock onto their cock cage, make them sit there and watch you fuck around with it – even while they have to awkwardly hold the cage together with their hands. You’re in charge, and that’s drilling in the point.
- When you’re ready to lock it, do one final check by snapping the lock closed while in your hand (off of the cage!) then putting the key into the lock to unlock it. This ensures that you have the key to open the lock, and it’s a vital safety step – that we just happened to make a bit sexy. Now you know you own the key that can unlock that lock – and even have it in your hands. Slide that lock onto the chastity cage and lock it shut.
- With the cage sealed, you can choose to command them to put their hands back into the restraints – or if you want something simpler since the ritual is almost done, command them to put their hands face-up on their thighs.
- Now place the chastity keys. Wearing them as jewelry is a popular option, and if that’s for you, feel free to make them sit and wait while you get the keys and slide them onto your necklace/bracelet/anklet. If you’re not really sure what you want to do with the keys, feel free to drop them into your bra (if you’re wearing one) or pocket (if you have one) to just accentuate the fact that the keys are yours now. For real though: don’t lose them.
- Command them to get dressed as you redo their restraints or move into the rest of your scene. Bonus points for having a chore or task for them to complete right away now that they’re locked away – solidifying their status as “lower than you”.
Pre-Written Dirty Talk
- This is mine now. I own it, and you’ll keep your greedy hands off of my property.
- Don’t worry; I’ll keep the key nice and safe for when I decide to unlock you again.
- I’m getting turned on thinking about all of the ways you’re going to have to please me before I consider unlocking you!
- Awww! It’s so cute when it’s all little and caged!
- Huh. This cage seems kinda…big. Are you sure it’s the right size for your, uh, size?
- Good! Now you’re all locked up and in your place. Let’s talk about how you’re going to make my life better.
- Now that it’s all safely protected, I’m just thinking about how many more orgasms I’m going to have compared to you.
- Well, today is day 1. We’ll see if you can make it to Day 100.
- Now that you’re unable to do anything about it, I think I’m going to start sleeping in my lingerie again. The pajamas can wait for another time.
Cautions!
Especially for cheap chastity cages (what most people pick up to start), the cage, itself, may not be safe. The sanding of the cage’s edges may not be complete, and it might leave sharp edges inside the internal parts of the cage. Ensure you (and your sub) run fingers through the internal chasm of the cage to check. Assume the penis has a similar sensitivity to your tongue; if you think your tongue would mind it, assume it’s not suitable for anything more than an hour’s wear on a body.
The “fit” of most chastity cages can be hard to figure out too. If your sub has already gone through part of my 24/7 Femdom Male Chastity Training Plan, they probably have a good idea of whether their device is a good fit for not, but especially for wearers brand new to chastity, their cage may be a piss-poor fit. This means that they may need to come out of the cage within an hour or so as things chafe or rub raw. This is pretty standard for new cage wearing, and try not to get frustrated about it.
(Feel free to sexualize it by embarrassing them for providing you a non-functional “toy” [aka, their penis] to play with. “Punish” by telling them you’ll be ignoring their cock entirely until it heals. And feel free to steal some of my Chastity Training Plan ideas to help figure out if the next cage is a good fit before getting too deep into the kink.)
Learn More about Chastity
Check out these related articles on Kinky World:
- How to Put on a Chastity Cage
- Male Chastity Training: 6 Weeks from Chastity Device Beginner to 24/7 Chastity Slave
- Christmas-Themed Chastity Game
- Easter-Themed Submissive Tasks
- Menstrual Period Chastity 101
- Femdom Locktober Calendar
