“The Sexy Bitch’s Book of Doing It, Getting It and Giving It” Book Review

September 30th, 14   •   Posted by Mistress Kay   •   No Comments »
The Sexy Bitch's Book of Doing It, Getting It and Giving It

The front cover

“The Sexy Bitch’s Book of Doing it, Getting it, and Giving it” is an Amorata Press book which is written by Flic Everett. The book has 8 different chapters which are included on 170 different pages. The book is a small size at about five inches tall and four inches wide, and it can easily be read in public as long as you hide the front cover while you’re reading it.

This sex book focuses on the idea of improving your sex life through the tips and tricks included in the book. The back cover claims “Over 100 Tips to work it like a sexy bitch”, “Master the 10 sure-fire positions”, and “Orgasm in ways you’ve never thought possible”. The book includes quite a few categories and topics of interest to cover a wide variety of what most people do in the bedrooms.

At the same time, because it covers so much, the book isn’t very focused. You won’t really find that the advice in this book, if you’ve read a couple sex-help books before, goes past what you’ve read in the past. It seems to be the basic information that you can get most places – just with the author’s honest flair put on it. In the “Advanced” section of the book, it seemed to be saying the exact same things that it said in the “basic” section – except without explaining anything too much. If you are someone who hasn’t read sex-help books before and thinks this is a good place to start, though, you could get some good advice out of it.

A nice thing about this book is how honest the authors were about their advice. They admit that most sex books (and sex position books) usually give a lot of sex positions and advice that can’t be done on a regular basis or by regular people. They note that fancy sex positions aren’t always the best and sometimes improving on the basics is what makes things most pleasurable. Throughout the book, the author gives an honest look at things you can do with your partner in order to be a better lover and things that you can suggest for him to do to you.

The book covers a lot of topics in a short amount of space. This makes it easy to read through and get a lot of information without having to spend a lot of time reading. The book covers foreplay, positions, orgasms, spicing it up, sex toys, adventurous sex, advanced sex, and spiritual sex. That basically means that it covers manual and oral sex along with intercourse, how to have orgasms, how to have better orgasms, how to make things more fun fo you and your partner including games, different types of sex toys and if they’re effective, sex clubs, BDSM, voyeurism and exhibitionism, and the spiritual side of sex including Tantra.

The Sexy Bitch's Book of Doing It, Getting It and Giving It

Some of the inner pages

I had a couple critiques with a couple sections. This book is copyright 2004, and while I’m sure sex toys have changed quite a bit since then, I found it really odd that the author didn’t include anything about male masturbation sleeves. The author talked about cock rings and sex dolls, but she didn’t include anything about male masturbation sleeves which tend to be pretty popular. Along with that, as the book doesn’t have any illustrations, attempting to picture some of the sex positions in my head was difficult. In the sex position chapter, it’s all described with text and there are no illustrations which makes it difficult to act them out. On the plus-side, though, all of the sex positions that are described are ones that the average person can get into and use on a regular basis.

While I certainly think it has some truth to it, I think the book did rely a bit too much on generalizations. For example, a lot of the tips relied on the idea that men are extremely visual creatures so you should show them your breasts are something. It also relied on the fact that women require romance and woo’ing which, again, isn’t quite accurate for everyone. I wouldn’t mind the generalizations quite as much if the book didn’t sometimes make it seem like, if you don’t fit into the generalization, something is really wrong with you.

I think the biggest issue, with this book, for me, was that sometimes, the author came across as very elitist which was really a turn-off. She made it sound like the readers of this book were “better” than everyone else who was attempting to improve their sex life. For example, in the section about exhibitionism, it talks about submitting your picture to a porn magazine to be listed in their “Ameteurs” section since you will stand out next to the “45-year-old on the worn couch with the tits like beanbags”.

Overall, while I think the book is a good idea, I feel like, in comparison to other sex-help books, there was some issues. I would love to see less generalizations as well as more information (and illustrations!) included with the sex positions and sex toys chapter. However, if you like the idea of the blunt, honest way of looking at sex-help that the author provides, this book can be an okay choice. Thanks to Amorata Press for providing this sex-help book for my “The Sexy Bitch’s Book of Doing it, Getting it, and Giving it” review.

Guy Tips for Successfully Using CraigsList to Hook-Up

September 17th, 14   •   Posted by Mistress Kay   •   No Comments »

Now, CraigsList is definitely a sketchy website in some cases. There’s a lot of people that post on there because there are issues in their real lives or they aren’t able to connect with people in real-life. Because of the anonymous aspect of it, it also makes it a great breeding ground to find potential victims or find somebody that’s less-than-stellar. At the same time, not everyone who uses it is bad. A lot of people are on there out of boredom or just because other dating attempts haven’t worked. And when it comes to No-Strings-Attached sex, CraigsList is still known as one of the better places to try.

So, let’s say you’re a guy and you’re answering female ads looking to hook-up. This guide is designed to help you. It’s really not designed for males answering any other types of ads as I imagine a male-to-male dialogue has different nuances, and I honestly am not familiar with it. However, as a female who has experience with these types of things, here’s what you really need to know if you want to be successful in using CraigsList for a one-night-stand.

You Can Post Your Own Ad, but Don’t Expect Much: You can post your own ad on CraigsList, but honestly don’t expect too much. A lot of responses may be spam, but some women do read the CraigsList listings now and again, so you may get lucky. Be clear and concise in what you’d like but also be respectful. Read other ads and see what guys tend to do – now DON’T do that. You want to stand out – and in a good way.

If You Respond, Respond Well: If a woman posts an ad and you’re interested, please take the time to write out a legitimate response. Lots of responses tend to fall under the “hi” or “i’m interested” category. Seriously? It’s laughable. You might assume that she gets the same responses to her ads that you get to yours, but you’d be wrong. It’s a USUAL occurrence for CraigsList casual sex ads posted by females to get 300-400 responses. Guess what? If you don’t do something to stand out, she’s going to delete your e-mail without even bothering to reply. You want to have sex? That’s fine, but understand there are lots of other people out there that do too, and they might have taken more time with a response than you.

Have Pictures but Don’t Send Unsolicited Ones: Yep, you probably own some pictures of your penis – and you might think they’re awesome. But after 300 pictures of penises (one in each e-mail), they don’t look some entertaining anymore. Unless she specifically asked for it, you’re probably better off leaving it out. Instead, try something more suggestive. Women are used to seeing penises just out and about – and it kinda isn’t all that special anymore. (Having something shoved in your face so often means it’s just not all that unique) However, suggestive can be fun. Consider taking a photo pulling down the corner of your jeans and underwear to expose a hip bone. You can always save the penis pictures for later – when the two of you are actively flirting and having fun.

Understand Her Need for Comfort: If you meet up a girl for casual sex, it’s pretty unlikely you’ll be harmed or raped. Guess what? Her chances are MUCH higher that harm will come to her. While you both are looking for something casual, it helps if you make it clear that her comfort comes first. If she wants to meet in public first, do that. For example, if you’re meeting in a hotel, offer to meet at the hotel bar, see if you both “click”, then disclose room numbers if you both want to. While every person has different comfort levels, it’s important that you make it clear that you respect her need for safety and comfort.

Respond to Her Ad: Don’t just copy and paste a reply to every ad that’s posted. Instead, take the time to actually respond to what her ad says. If she says she’s looking for a good night of fun, tonight, you might want to make it clear that you have time available tonight. If she wants to fulfill a specific fantasy, respond with information about how you’d be a good choice. Read her ad; usually it’s obvious if she’s looking for a hot and sexy fantasy tonight or if she wants a good guy a week from now after she’s had some conversation with him.

Protect Your Own Safety: While it may not cross your mind, keep your own safety close as well. Just in case, consider leaving a notepad with where you went and who you went to meet on it in case something happens. You never know – you could end up meeting a male instead of a female, and it could potentially be dangerous. (Females can be dangerous too, of course, but it’s just much less likely) Also ensure that you have your own condoms and lubricant. In case she doesn’t have any, you’ll want to be protected and ready for your own fun.

I’m curious: have you ever used CraigsList successfully? Has it worked out for you?

Zeus Electrosex Twilight Wand Review

August 25th, 14   •   Posted by Mistress Kay   •   No Comments »
Zeus Electrosex Twilight Wand

Zeus Electrosex Twilight Wand

One of the latest trends in electric sensations, the Zeus Electrosex Twilight Wand is an affordable Violet Wand that provides pleasurable electric currents through the skin. Including 4 separate glass attachments and the wand itself, the Twilight Wand offers electro-stimulation.

This Violet Wand comes packaged in a sturdy box that’s going to work for storage. The interior is all lined with thick foam that has cut-out areas for each one of the glass attachments as well as the wand itself. It also comes with an instruction book that’s going to explain how to use the wand. For safety, PLEASE read the instruction book before going nuts with using the wand. It will work fantastically for storage, but it’s not particularly discreet. It does clearly state what’s inside the box on the outside of the packaging.

Basically, the Twilight Wand is electronic device that channels electricity through the glass attachments and then to the skin. The electricity will only “discharge” when there’s space for it to jump. Basically, if you have the glass attachments directly resting on the skin, nothing happens. However, if you let the attachments lightly hover over the skin, it will produce a pleasurable spark that travels between the wand and the skin. Perfect for beginners, the Twilight Wand includes a small knob at the base that allows you to adjust the intensity of the spark, so nothing has to be too intense. In use, you can even see the spark jump the gap between people – especially if you turn down the lights.

Zeus Electrosex Twilight Wand

Zeus Electrosex Twilight Wand packaging

Like any electrostimulation sex toy, this toy has some pretty important safety information that should be followed: This shouldn’t be used with anyone with heart conditions, pacemakers, or those who are pregnant. Like all electricity, keep it away from flammable liquids, gas, or water. It shouldn’t be used in a single spot for more than 10 seconds as it could burn the skin. Immediately cease use if something seems fishy – like it has an odd smell, has smoke, sounds odd, or just seems like something is “off”.

As an important note that may apply to LOTS of people: Do NOT use the Twilight Wand on any jewelry, watches, or body piercings. It may transfer the electricity with more intensity than intended and in the case of watches or other electronics, it does have a possibility of destroying the electrical aspect of it – and who wants that?

A lot of people that I’ve talked to have a fear of electro-play. Honestly, there’s nothing to be afraid of. There are a lot of safeguards in place, and if you’re going to start with electricity play, a Violet Wand design is the way to go. With something like the Twilight Wand, you can easily hear the buzzing from the electricity. As the buzzing gets louder the more intense the settings are at, you can use this aural indicator to ensure that things are at a level you can handle. It’s also possible to turn the wand all the way down in intensity (and it gets to about the level where you can’t even feel it!) then slowly increase intensity as you find out what you’re comfortable with. Compared to other types of electro-play toys (such as TENS Units), I really find Violet Wands to be much less scary.

Zeus Electrosex Twilight Wand

Showing one of the glass electrodes

I’ve played around with many of the Violet Wand sets before, and with that in mind, I’m impressed with the Twilight Wand. Standard Violet Wand sets can cost upwards of $400 – and that’s with a basic kit. The Twilight Wand helps you save a lot of money compared to that! I’m unsure if it will be compatible with many of the Violet Wand accessories that exist out there, but if you wanted a lower cost alternative anyway, the Violet Wand could work fantastically.

The kit does include an instruction manual, but it’s pretty basic. If you have very little experience with electro-sex, I highly recommend that you do some online reading in addition to the instruction manual. The instruction manual will teach you how to use the Twilight Wand, but it doesn’t really give any safety or further information about using a Violet-Wand-Type-Toy in general. I’ve seen much more comprehensive instruction manuals before, and I’ll admit to being surprised that the instruction manual for this isn’t more comprehensive considering this kit is aimed towards a lot of electrosex beginners.

It’s pretty easy to use as well. Even if you’re new to electro-sex or Violet Wands, you’ll pick up the Twilight Wand pretty easily. As long as you put safety first, you’ll have no problem with this wand. The wand should always be off when not in use or when changing electrodes (I like to unplug the wand to be extra safe). The electrode then just simply slips snugly into the hole in the Wand. There’s no snapping or extra pieces to deal with. Once you have the electrode fitted into the Twilight Wand, you can start using it. Start with the lower settings and work your way up as your partner enjoys the sensation. When you’re done, turn off the wand and gently wiggle the electrode while pulling to remove it from the wand. Remember that the electrodes are made from glass, however, so ensure that you treat them with care.

Zeus Electrosex Twilight Wand

Showing how the Twilight Wand fits together

Each one of the electrodes provides a different type of sensation. Remember, as the point of contact becomes smaller, the sensation will become more intense. The Twilight Wand kit includes 4 electrodes: the Ambient, Halo, Illume, and Flux. As a beginner, I recommend starting off with the Flux (rake-looking) attachment as it produces the least intense sensations. The Ambient (single point) attachment is the most intense, and if you use it too intensely (staying in one spot for more than 10 seconds, full-power, etc.), it could possibly burn. The Halo and Illume produce more diffused sensations that spread out throughout the wide spots that the tips include.

Compared to a regular Violet Wand, this wand is definitely a bit different. It’s not a bad way, though. The average Violet Wand can’t be turned upside down. It will cut the power to the wand and make it stop working. That’s not a problem with the Twilight Wand. It’s made with a different inner core. It also feels a lot lighter and more mobile than other Violet Wands. Of course, there’s the fact that it also feels much more modern and not nearly as old as the usual Violet Wand does.

Using this is definitely a good experience as well. You get pretty much everything you need to experience this electro-sensation in this single kit. I wish the attachments were a bit differently-shaped as some of the attachments tend to feel similar to one another. However, it works perfectly for our uses. We can use it in the moderate range which produces pleasurable sensations that causing lovely moaning and shivering. It could go higher if we need, but the moderate levels have worked fantastically for us – and will work similarly for most people, I believe. The wand isn’t extremely loud, but it’s important that you’re aware that it does make some noise. It definitely can be heard in the same room, but if you turn on loud music/television, it’d be hard to hear it outside of a closed door.

Overall, it’s a good kit. If this is the kit you want, I have no reason that you shouldn’t purchase it. However, I’d steer most people towards the Neon Wand instead. Very similar in design and attachments, but the Neon Wand includes a more thorough instruction manual and allows you to choose various colors for your sparks when purchasing your wand. However, if you love the Twilight Wand and think it’s the right one for you, go right ahead! There’s no reason not to purchase it; just make sure to do some reading on your own about electro-sex safety. Thanks to Pink Cherry Sex Toys for providing this electrosex sex toy for my Twilight Wand review. They also sell the Neon Wand which was meantioned above in my review as well.

Silicone-Based UberLube Personal Lubricant Review!

August 13th, 14   •   Posted by Mistress Kay   •   No Comments »
Silicone-Based UberLube Personal Lubricant

Silicone-Based UberLube Personal Lubricant in various bottle sizes

UberLube is a silicone-based lubricant designed to be more elegant and user-friendly than standard lubricants. Sold by Lucky Bloke, this lubricant is available in multiple size formats including a 50ml, 100ml, and sample-sized bottles.

As a silicone-based lubricant, UberLube is completely safe for use with all latex and other safer sex barriers. It can be used with any type of sex toy material aside from silicone, and it can be used for anal or vaginal use. It can be used for massage purposes as well. The taste isn’t fantastic, so I wouldn’t recommend going nuts with oral use, but it’s not horrible if you accidentally get some somewhere you didn’t intend.

I’m pretty impressed with the longevity of UberLube. Since it’s silicone, it should definitely last a long time, but it lasts longer than expected. I haven’t had any reason to reapply during regular sex, and during anal sex, it has to be applied even less often than usual. It still is silicone lubricant, though, so it’s not quite as thick as would be preferred, but the thinness mixed with the long-lasting slippery aspect does work out just fine.

It’s just like standard silicone lubricant, though, and it doesn’t clean up particularly well. I’ll give it points for cleaning up better than most silicone lubricant. If you wipe it up and only leave a bit on your skin, it will dry up pretty nicely on its own. If everything is still all wet and slippery, it has a hard time drying into the skin properly. So if you don’t want to go all-out with the warm water and anti-bacterial soap to get it off, just wipe it off and the remaining bit will dry into the skin (from experience).

Silicone-Based UberLube Personal Lubricant

Silicone-Based UberLube Personal Lubricant

As anyone who has ever used a silicone lubricant can tell you, it’s slippery – and it’s definitely to clean. As anyone has ever has used a lubricant at all can tell you, lubricant tends to get on the bottle when you’re using it. Between these two things and the glass bottle for UberLube, you have a recipe for disaster. It’s not the worst thing in the world, but handling the bottle is a giant pain in the ass if it gets lubricant on it. Glass gets slippery easily, and this lubricant is no different. While the elegant glass design is beautiful, I’d love to see UberLube add a textured label or change the bottle design so it’s not so damn slippery when it’s wet. It’s frustrating and feels “icky” while handling. If you can manage to avoid getting lubricant on the glass bottle, though, it’s not a big deal.

I love that UberLube offers their lubricant in multiple types of packaging as well. For those that just want a bed-side companion, you can get one of their glass bottles. If you want something for a weekend away, one of the vials of water-based lubricant is fantastic without being too much. If it’s just a one-time thing, they offer small packets of lubricant for single-use. By far, you get the best value with the bedside bottle, but if you travel a lot and hate taking more than you need, the smaller options are fantastic. They’ve even made a travel-friendly option with the logo on the interior for absolutely discretion (doesn’t look like lube at all).

While that isn’t the focus of what this website would review it for, UberLube is also fond of mentioning that it can be used for athletics as an anti-chafing solution (and I’ve heard that it works pretty well for that!) and that it can be used for stylish as a hair product.

Overall, this is a good choice of silicone-based lubricants. It seems to do better than other silicone-based lubes at the good things – and is less annoying for the bad things. It lasts longer than I expected, and it actually cleans up better than other silicone-based ones as well. Plus, the packaging is absolutely stunning and doesn’t look cheesy like a lot of sex toy packaging is prone to do. If you need a silicone-based lubricant, I’d say that it’d be hard to go wrong with UberLube. Thanks to Lucky Bloke for sending out this UberLube silicone-based lubricant for my UberLube review.