Pirates: Stagnetti’s Revenge Review

Pirates 2: Stagnetti's Revenge
The title screen

Pirates 2: Stagnetti’s Revenge is a four-disk DVD movie set that’s the sequel to the original Pirates. The movie runs about about 137 minutes, is produced by Digital Productions, and directed by Joone. It was the winner of 15 different AVN Awards including a 2009 Best Video Feature. The movie includes 10 seperate sex scenes. It stars Evan Stone and Jesse Jane with other roles including Tommy Gunn, Brianna Love, Jenna Haze, Katsuni, Sasha Grey, Belladonna, Shay Jordan, and Brianna Stone.

Pirates 2: Stagnetti's Revenge
Shay Jordan with the guys under the boat

The movie itself takes up one disk of the entire four-disk set while the other special features take up the extra three disks. This is the special collector’s edition that can be bought at this sex toy store. One of the discs is extended sex scenes, another disk is the Behind the Scenes, and the last disk is the Special Features disk. The scene selection feature is relatively basic. You can’t select by sex scene – you can only select by by the scene number which doesn’t really give you any sort of idea of what sex scenes are included in that particular scene. With about sixty different scenes, unless you memorize the numbers of your favorites, it will be hard to find them.

Pirates 2: Stagnetti's Revenge
The Governor with his “ladies”

Like the first Pirates movie, this movie is pretty heavy on the humor which makes it a great watch. However, probably after taking the criticism from the first movie, this one definitely has a lot more sex and toned down on the humor. The sex is almost always playful or has emotional undertones behind it (at least, story-line wise.) So while there is some good humor and a storyline, the storyline suffers because of all of the extra sex that was added to the movie. Understandably, though, since this is a porn, that the sex would happen to come before the storyline. Regardless, Pirates was one of my favorite movies because of the great storyline, so seeing it toned down in the sequeul made me a little sad.

Pirates 2: Stagnetti's Revenge
Jesse Jane and Belladonna

Since this movie came three years after the first one, the special effects have vastly improved. It wasn’t amazing like a motion picture, but the special effects definitely got the point across. It was easy to believe the special effects were real. For example, there’s a large fight between Evan Stone and a large sea-looking monster in an arena. There are more of the skeletons that rise from the grave for the crewmen to fight as well. There’s a large sea-monster towards the end of the omvie as well. They all look relatively-realistic, and this is really a huge step for the “science fiction” aspect of pornography.

Pirates 2: Stagnetti's Revenge
Evan Stone during the giant orgy

The movie starts off with us finding out that an important crystal was stolen from a random ship by the Pirate ship led by Katsuni. After Evan Stone’s character, Edward, gives us a bit of a flashback on the last movie, we start in on this movie’s events. We find out that the Pirate’s old first-mate from the last movie has left the Pirate Hunter ship but she is wanted by the government for helping the Pirates. We find out that Woo’s (the orientatal guy from the last movie) sister now has ended up on the ship, but she’s a bit of a loose woman. This upsets Woo and leads to lots of humor, but she does start us off with the first sex scene out of the movie.

Pirates 2: Stagnetti's Revenge
Jenna Haze and Evan Stone during their scene with her as his “sex slave”

Set in the dark hold of the ship, Ai (Woo’s sister, played by Shay Jordan) ends up with a three-way with two of the shipmate’s – James Deen and Mick-Blue. She gives them both oral sex, receives vaginal sex, and it ends up being a pretty sweaty and dirty affair. It was nice to see Shay Jordan’s natural body with natural breasts and pubic hair in a porn for once. It ends with Shay receiving both of their ejaculate on her face and mouth.

We then cut to a see of the Governot (Ben English) pretending to be a Pirate and “force” his two young women (Riley Steele and Shawna Lenee) to submit to his “plundering”. Of course, it includes lots of oral sex for the guy and lots of vaginal sex. I have to say that this scene was slightly annoying because the positions the actors were in changed about every twenty seconds. The camera would zoom in, when when it zoomed out, there was a new position. It made it a bit hard to enjoy the scenes. After the scene, the Governor meets with Evan Stone to say that, if Evan finds the crystal that was stolen, the Governor will pardon the old Pirate’s first mate from arrest. They decide to go on an adventure.

Pirates 2: Stagnetti's Revenge
Evan Stone telling his story about defeating Stagnetti. Not sure what it has to do with riding a lamp though.

The old Pirate first-mate’s sister (this all gets way too confusing for a porn) is now a member of the crew. She comes up to Jesse Jane (the first-mate) and suggests a muntiny against Evan Stone. Jesse Jane is insulted, and of course, this leads to angry lesbian sex. There’s all sorts of fighting, shoving, and changing of positions as they fight to see who orgasms last. (Yes, I guess you win if you make the other person orgasm first.) Overall, a pretty hot scene. Nothing amazingly steamy, but it’s still pretty hot compared to most other lesbian scenes. There’s even some scissoring included, but it isn’t for long.

Pirates 2: Stagnetti's Revenge
Tommy Gunn, Jesse Jane, and Katsuni

After the scene, Jesse Jane meets up with Evan Stone, and the two of them adventure to the Pirate Island to attempt to find Katsuni and recover the crystal. In the meantime, Woo ends up losing track of his sister (Shay Jordon) and goes off the boat where he was supposed to stay to try and find her. When Jesse Jane wanders off, Evan Stone ends up at a “slave” auction where he ends up paying a very high price for a gorgeous slave. (Jenna Haze)

To congratulate him on his win, a wealthy Pirate takes Evan Stone back to his mansion where there’s tons of gorgeous, naked women. It ends up becoming a giant orgy, and we watch while Brea, Abbey, Veronica, Stoya, Gabriella, Shyla, Manuel, and Charles Marco participate in a giant orgy. The camera focused on one couple while the other couples would do some sensual touching in the background. Awkwardly, Evan Stone just sits with his wealthy-Pirate buddy on the sidelines drinking wine and eating fruit while there’s lots of moaning and screaming. His lack of parcipation coupled with his smirking and nodding approval about the orgy was definitely giggle-worthy.

Pirates 2: Stagnetti's Revenge
Evan Stone defeating the skeleton monsters

Marco is sitting around in a bar moaning his break-up about Jesse Jane (happened in the last movie) when his friends find a “massage” woman to keep him company. Of course, it’s Ai (Shay Jordan.) After Marco cries about his loss, this leads to a sex scene between the two of them. The sex gets slightly rough, but it’s mostly short and to the point. Afterwards, Ai confesses her love to Marco (with his new nickname “Panda”), and he freaks out. She whines about him marrying her, and in some humor (while she’s still naked and everything), she starts pushing on pressure points of his body until he agrees to marry her.

After the orgy, Evan Stone goes into a private back room to have some time with the “slave” (Jenna Haze) he won. This scene consists of a lot of “Yes Masters” to Evan which is pretty hot. She gives him oral sex before it moves onto anal sex. The climax was the most funny part because he made her repeat things like “I killed Stagnetti” and other things while he finished on her stomach. He climaxes with the statement “I am the greatest Pirate Hunter that ever lived!”

Pirates 2: Stagnetti's Revenge
Marco, Jesse Jane, and Shay Jordan

Right after his sex scene, Jesse Jane breaks into his private room and tries to seduce him. Of course, Evan doesn’t know that the evil Katsuni has gotten ahold of Jesse and brainwashed her. Jesse never actually has sex with him, and Katsuni breaks in and kidnaps Evan before anything happens. Evan is thrown into a large colleseum to fight against a large monster for the Pirate’s amusement. He gets backed into a corner, and almost killed, but Belladonna’s character comes in and, with neat special effects, does some backflips and slices down the stomach of the beast – killing it.

After lots of different talking scenes to further enhance the plot (but I won’t go into here), Evan is brought two females (Brianna Stone, Rhylee) into his room who wish to hear his story of defeating Stagnetti. Of course, it’s ridiculously embellished to impress the girls. After the story, the girls want to “reward” him for all of his heroic deeds. The scene includes oral sex for him along with some interesting positions with one girl receiving Evan Stone’s penis while the other girl plays with Evan or the girl receiving. Overall, a pretty hot scene because of some of the unique positions.

After his sex scene, we find that the Pirates have brought Stagnetti back from the grave. Of course, to welcome him back, we jump right into a threeway between Katsuni, Jesse Jane, and Tommy Gunn (Stagnetti). Since both of the women are “subserviant” to him, he pretty much leads all of the action. All of this scene is done with Jesse Jane’s hands cuffed up behind her back, so it adds another realm of kink to it. Katsuni is dominant over Jesse Jane, and the scene reflects that when she forces Jesse down to give blowjobs or things like that.

Pirates 2: Stagnetti's Revenge
Evan Stone, Belladonna, and Sasha Grey for a hot threesome.

Right after that sex scene, we get into an epic battle. There’s a battle with Belladonna, Evan, and the skeletons (with Evan getting his sword stuck in the skeleton like always). A sea serpent gets involved, but of course, they find a (very) humorous way to defeat it. Belladonna and Katsuni get into a sword fight. Shortly after, Jesse Jane and Stagnetti go up against Belladonna. In this case, Belladonna falls and loses the battle, but shortly after, Evan Stone comes in to save the day and pushes Stagnetti overboard.

Now that the movie’s plot is over, we pretty much go straight into the sex scenes. Marco is sitting alone in the bedroom when Jesse Jane walks in to talk about their past relationships. They get into a “sexual” argument and end up kissing. Shay Jordan ends up walking in in the middle of it and becomes upset and asks Marco “Do you love me?”. When he answers yes, Shay smiles and says “Okay. Then you can fuck her.” After a short discussion about it, they decide to have a threesome instead. Again, the guy gets a blowjob, the girls touch each other, and the guy takes turns penetrating the two of them.

After their scene, Belladonna and Sasha Grey come into apologize to Evan Stone for being so mean to him. It ends up in a threesome. Again a blowjob, but this time, they end up doing anal with Evan. The blowjobs are pretty extreme though with some intense deep-throating, the girls are rough on one another, and the positions are awkward. (Some with Evan hanging from the ceiling and others with his head on the floor and body on the bed.) The end of the threesome ends in some pretty gross cum-sharing though. Wasn’t fond of that. That’s the end of the movie though.

Overall, the sex scenes were alright. I unfortunately feel like the scenes were pretty contrived and boring on the content for the most part. Blowjob, then sex, then cum. There’s not much deviation from the plan and minimal attention is paid to the female’s pleasure. I feel like adding some variation to the “pattern” would have helped improve the sex scenes to make them something worth watching again. The lesbian scene and the final scene were probably my two favorites, and they would be something worth watching again.

The bonus features are numerous. For one, there’s a huge “Behind the Scenes” section that was amusing to watch. There’s Featurettes that dig into things like the special effects, the costumes, training to sword fight, and things like that. There’s bloopers which were funny, but moderately so. I feel like there was something a little more funny that must have taken place. There were deleted scenes which included a scene about Marco and Shay’s wedding and a hilarious spoof of Evan Stone pretending to be in a Star Trek episode where makes a “gun” out of nothing and shoots up the green evil dude. The boyfriend, who is a nerd, was in tears of giggling during this. I was lost wondering where that would have fit in the movie.

Overall, though, the movie is pretty good, but in terms of storyline, it lacked from the first Pirates. In terms of sex scenes, though, they definitely included more, but it just seems like they were going for quantity over quality. The new characters were a great addition, and Sasha Grey looked smoking in her pirate-hunter outfit. If you are a fan of a good storyline, good sex scenes, lots of bonus features, or hot girls, Pirates: Stagnetti’s Revenge is a great DVD to check out. That sex toy store also sells other adult DVDs.

Mistress Kay
Mistress Kay
Sex toy reviewer, kink educator, and weirdo who is constantly staging pretty photos for sex toys.

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