Water bondage: taking everything you love about bondage and moving it into a wet zone. If you love being restrained, this might just be a whole new way to experience bondage. Whether you want to play in the bathtub, a puddle, the shower, the hot tub, a pool, a pond, or the ocean, there are ways to explore bondage in the water that can be fun for the both of you.
Some people even have kinks focused on being bound in the water. Whether you have fantasies about bathtub bondage or just find the feeling of wet clothing plastered to your skin to be amazing, there are lots of ways to add bondage to your aquatic play.
However, you also need to be careful. Water is, inherently, dangerous. You can drown in just a few inches of water. Since bondage can be a risky activity on its own, adding bondage and water together can be downright deadly (literally!). So, if you decide to play with bondage in the water, you really, really, really need to know what you’re doing – especially if you’re going to take on some of the riskier forms of water bondage.
Safety First …
Like any BDSM activity, you should be aware of the risks involved and take steps to manage those risks. Water bondage, more than many other activities, requires even more attention to potential risk. After all, you’re mixing the pleasures of restraint with the fun of an aquatic environment. That “fun” also happens to include the risk of drowning and death. To make things as safe as possible:
Discuss What Your Ideas Actually Are: Before either you or your partner even thinks about getting into the water, you should both have a discussion about what fantasy you have in mind. If you are thinking of being dunked underwater and yet your partner just wants to try using bondage cuffs in the shower, neither of you will come away from the encounter feeling happy. Take the time to make sure that you’re on the same page before anyone gets wet (no pun intended).
A Safeword Is Nice, But…: If you’re playing with water, there’s a chance that your partner may not be able to easily speak. Safe words and non-verbal safewords are helpful, but in this case, your safeword may not be able to function as you intend it to. For that reason, do not go off-script at all, and avoid any type of consensual non-consent scene when playing with water bondage.
Understand the Risks: Do you know what the risks of water bondage are? Have you looked into what water inhalation can do to someone – or what the telltale signs of drowning are? Do you know how to do CPR and have your cell phone available and nearby in case of an absolute emergency? Understand that water bondage, especially in large bodies of water that aren’t readily available in your bathroom (like pools, oceans, ponds, or jacuzzis), is unsafe.
People drown, every day, just attempting to swim. What makes you think adding bondage into the equation is going to make that even safer? Understand the risks, know the risks, mitigate the risks – but ultimately, this may be a risk you’re uncomfortable taking. As part of that earlier negotiation, ensure both partners know the risks – and possibly keep things in small bodies of water if someone is concerned.
Plan It Out. Like, All the Way: Water bondage is not the time to introduce surprising elements to play. There are way, way too many things that can go wrong. Instead, treat your water bondage scene like it’s a fully planned out, by-the-book scene. Discuss and negotiate the outline with your partner, know exactly what everyone should expect, and stick to the plan. The sensations of water bondage can be an amazing-enough experience; there’s no need to try to add “surprises” to the mix.
Most Importantly, Be Prepared to Quit: A lot of us (myself included sometimes) can get so stuck in the “this is what the scene is supposed to be” that my own ego can make it difficult to call it quits. Those hesitations in water bondage can mean death. If something seems wrong – even a little bit wrong – call it quits. At a bare minimum, cut the scene itself and check in with your partner. Use your Dom-ly voice if you want, but make sure you get a straight answer out of your partner before continuing. You can always do the scene again if you cut things prematurely, but you can do irreparable harm (both mentally and physically) if you let things go past where they should have.
Ensure The Bound Person Can Always Touch the Ground: If you’re going to be doing any bondage on a person in water, you need to ensure that they can always touch the ground. Since you’ll likely be removing some of their ability to swim, this becomes the NUMBER 1 consideration. And I mean they need to “always” be able to touch the ground. If you’re playing in a wave pool or somewhere where water moves, that likely means choosing much shallower water – or moving somewhere with steady water in the first place. Moving water = more complicating factors that aren’t necessarily fun to deal with.
Think about Slippage: It’s easy to get focused on the breathing thing, but unexpected falls can be just as dangerous. Remember that wet surfaces get slippery, and a partner who has bound limbs can’t easily catch themselves. They’re at much-higher risk for whacking their head (which can kill you – or at the very least, give you a concussion) if they fall. Plan this into your game plan.
Stay Seated: For the most safety possible, ensure the bound person can sit on “the ground” while their head remains entirely and comfortably out of the water. This is very easy to achieve in certain aquatic set-ups like a jacuzzi or a bathtub, but if you’re playing with a pool, you’ll probably need to use the concrete entry stairs to make that happen.
Avoid Gags Entirely: Breathing is pretty much the #1 concern about water bondage. That’s why gags can be a bad, bad idea. Not only do gags keep the mouth from closing, but they make it harder to swallow, they make it harder to keep water from getting in, and they make it harder for someone to communicate a problem. If you control the stream of water (like in your own bathtub), you can probably get away with mouth gags, but if the water has any sort of unpredictability, keep mouth gags out of the equation.
(Please, also, consider emergency situations. If your water bondage play included your 6-foot partner standing in a 3-foot-deep pool with a gag on, you probably assumed their mouth would be fine. However, if they faint, that mouth is going straight into the pool and getting water in it – no matter how close you may be.)
Use Flotation Devices: If it fits into your scene, there’s no reason that you can’t use flotation devices. Depending on your dynamic, this can become a fun point of humiliation if you use the obnoxiously-colored ones – or you can use some of the adult, svelte ones just to add safety. Plus, you’ll be sexualizing safe water play, and imagine how much fun it’s going to be when they’re trying to take a vanilla water outing and the only thing they can think of is how they last used their water safety equipment. Yum.
Avoid Underwater Play Entirely: Unless you are extremely advanced with water bondage, are an expert in medical issues, and have a long-term partner you trust with your life, you shouldn’t be playing with any fully underwater bondage. You are, presumably, not reading this article if you are at that level of expertise. So for everyone here, don’t do anything that stick’s the bound person’s head underwater at any point. Don’t dunk them. Don’t play in a water level that’s too high.
The Safest Restraints Are No Restraints: It sounds obvious, but it’s the truth. The safest type of water bondage is going to be any bondage that leaves your partner’s limbs entirely unbound. That means that using your body to keep theirs in place (which allows you to easily let go in case of emergency) or using mental bondage to force them to keep themselves in place are going to be your safest options.
Doesn’t Take Much: Keep in mind that it doesn’t take much water to really “make” a water play scene. You can put your partner in a puddle’s worth in the bathtub – and you have a water play scene. You can set your partner in the shower and splash water onto them – and you have a water play scene.
You Can Always Play Outside of the Water Too: On that note, it’s worth reiterating that you don’t have to play inside the source of the water. You can easily move all of your sex and bondage next to the water source. You can use the “no restraints” methods inside the pool – but have an elaborate bondage set-up ready just 10 feet away from the water. It’s always up to your comfort level, your risk tolerance, and how much interest you have in setting up and ensuring everything runs smoothly for water bondage.
As you can see, there are a lot of things to consider before enjoying water bondage. Make sure you take the proper time to plan out the safety aspects of your playtime to make sure everyone walks (or crawls, depending upon how intense the orgasms are) away safely from the experience.
Choose the Right Tools
Did you know that most bondage items aren’t water-friendly? Leather isn’t particularly fond of being left in damp conditions for long periods of time. Unfortunately, putting it underwater tends to count as a “damp condition.”
For that reason, you’ll want bondage accessories that are up to the task of aquatic play. Look for items made from neoprene. Neoprene is a fantastic, durable material that plays well in water. From neoprene strap-on harnesses to neoprene cuffs to neoprene collars, there are a whole lot of options out there.
If you want to get specialized toys, there are bondage items especially designed for water play, including cuffs that come equipped with suction cups to adhere to the surface of your shower or tub. There are also knee pads that make the surface of the tub easier to kneel on as well as dildos equipped with suction cups to stick up against walls.
If the idea of spraying water on your partner appeals to you, you’ll need the tools to achieve that. For many, a showerhead with a hand-held component works quite well. If the hand-held showerhead has adjustable speed and water levels, it’ll allow you both to choose the optimal intensity for your play.
No matter what type of items you choose, make sure to allow your bondage gear to fully dry after use to avoid mold or rust.
Choose the Right Location
Water bondage requires even more time, patience, and scouting to ensure you have a proper and safe location compared to choosing an aquatic location for sex.
The best choice is your home. Not only will you have perfect privacy, but you can control the environment and equip it with a bunch of items for safety. For most of us, that may mean our home shower or bathtub.
If you’re one of the lucky few with a Jacuzzi or pool, explore those options! Make sure that you’ve followed the safety tips above to ensure that your home bathroom is ready for kinky (and safe) water bondage fun.
Choose a time when you’re home alone or have absolute privacy. Make sure that you haven’t drained the hot water supply if you plan on a long play session.
Pools can be a really fun way to enjoy water bondage, but most of us only have access to public pools – which can make them a no-go. When it comes to the pool, a lake, or the ocean, though, it’s imperative that you both be able to stand upright without needing to swim. If your feet can’t touch the bottom, it’s not a good area for play. Being able to comfortably sit somewhere is even better.
No matter what your water location is, make sure the water is clean and safe for sexual activities. If possible, also try to warm the water to a comfortable temperature to avoid burns or frozen limbs interrupting your play.
Check-In Afterwards
Do you know how some people say that the reality may not be as good as your fantasy? For that reason, it’s important that the two of you have a short discussion after playing to make sure it was something that you both enjoyed.
If it wasn’t, maybe a couple of friendly suggestions to make it better next time. Never focus on the negative; all that does is foster a bad attitude. Instead, try framing your suggestion in a positive light such as saying, “I really loved it when you splashed my breasts with water, but when you splashed my face with water it made it harder to breathe and focus on getting off. Next time, can we focus on just my breasts because you made it feel so nice?”
Of course, make sure to enjoy yourselves as well! If it turns out that water bondage just isn’t something you’re into, don’t worry about it! You don’t have to be turned on by every sexual idea that’s out there. Just enjoy the journey and have fun exploring new types of sexuality with one another.
Easy Beginner Water Bondage Scene
Want to explore a little bit of these tips without some of the risks? Consider some rope bondage in the bathtub.
It’s really that simple. Get a strand of nylon rope (not natural fibers like hemp or jute that behave differently when wet). Ask your partner to sit on the floor of your bathtub. You can then start to fill the bathtub with water while using the nylon rope to bind their wrists. Add in all the dirty talk you want – about how they’re at your mercy, how they can’t leave until you want them to, anything. (Underfill the bathtub. You should expect a bit of wiggling around and resistance from your bound partner, and the last thing you want is to get a certifiable ocean on your bathroom floor.)
From there, you can do anything you want. Pleasure them while they’re sitting in a layer of water. Drain some water and add cold/hot water to shock them or make them uncomfortable. (Do NOT burn them with water or add anything electric with a cord – standard water safety rules) If you have a waterproof vibrator or sex toy, use that. Really, the world is your oyster.
If the bathtub has a showerhead, turn on the shower and add more water directly on top of them while they’re sitting in their puddle of water. Avoid any water going directly onto the face, and if possible (like a handheld showerhead), spray it into a corner first to ensure the temperature is right before using it on your partner.
(Protip: Some people have kinks/fetishes for wet clothes. If you want to quickly add more sensation to your scene, just have your partner leave their clothes on.)
See? That’s it. All you needed was a simple piece of nylon rope and your own bathtub for an extremely safe and beginner-friendly water play scene.
This article originally appeared at Kinkly: Water Bondage 101. I have made changes and updated it for publication here.
