“Tantric Sex for Busy Couples” is a Hunter House book that focuses on how to have tantric sex in your relationship in less than ten minutes a day. This book is written by Diana Daffner, but you get side comments from Richard Daffner (her husband) throughout the book. The book is 212 pages long, and it’s split into 5 chapters. The book took me about three hours to read, but a lot of the terminology was unfamiliar, and I ended up stumbling through the book more than anything else. The book has easy-to-read text, and in some places (where it would illustrate better), it includes diagrams and illustrations.
I really enjoyed the theme with this book. When I think of tantric sex, I think of long, drawn-out sex sessions, so if a book was going to show me how to do tantric sex while still making it fit into my schedule, I was definitely sold. Everyone seems to definitely enjoy tantric sex from what I’ve been told, so I figured it was worth looking into. However, I will definitely note that I was only curious about what Tantric sex was going to be about. For that reason, I think the book actually turned me off of Tantric sex a little bit. If you already know that Tantric sex is something you definitely want to get into, or if you have a spiritual life in the first place, this book is definitely helpful. If you are just looking for a way to deepen your sexual relationship but aren’t really interested in the Tantric side of it all, you may find this book more overwhelming than helpful.
This book is definitely directed at those who already have a spiritual belief in life or who have already known they’re interested in Tantra. The first fifty pages is all full of information about why you should practice Tantra, why it’s good for the two of you, and how it changed the author’s sex life to practice it. This first chapter does make a lot of sense, and it will lead you well into the rest of the book’s topic, but at the same time, I felt alienated because I didn’t want to have a deep, spiritual connection with the Earth. I was just looking at how to get closer to my partner, and the book really stresses the entire package of Tantra. This makes perfect sense for people who already know they are definitely interested in Tantra, but for those of us who are just curious, it can seem pretty alienating and like it’s a lot of work.
The book does cover a lot of what you need to know in order to approach Tantric sex though, and it covers it in a way that’s pretty easy to understand. After the introduction, the book moves onto all sorts of Tantra Tai Chi exercises. Tantra Tai Chi moves are basically moves that the two of you do to reconnect before you actually have sex it. It’s like pre-sex Yoga almost. The moves are basically moves that require you and your partner to stand or sit across from each other and share your spiritual energy. The book provides pictures that show how to do each one of the moves as well as text that explains what the two of you should be focusing on as well as how to best do the move for the best results.
The next chapter is all about the sexy stuff. The book talks about the importance of continuing your desire instead of just reaching for orgasms. From there, it focuses a lot on different sex positions that work best for Tantric sex. With those sex positions, there is text that talks about how to get the best connection in those positions as well as illustrations to show how, exactly, to do the sex positions.
After that, the book talks about the Yin and Yang of Tantric sex. This entire chapter basically stresses the importance of using massage on one another. While it covers body massage, it also covers genital massage as well, so it isn’t just talking about doing back rubs. This chapter stresses the importance of both giving and receiving for better Tantric sex. There are diagrams that show the genitals and explain what parts do what as well as what works best for each one of the techniques for Yin and Yang.
The last chapter, “A Commitment to Intimacy” is all about how to fit Tantric sex into just ten minutes a day. It doesn’t really explain that you have to do all of the previously explained activities, but instead, it explains small games and small ways that you can bring Tantric sex into your life. It explains the importance of commitment and being open to intimacy as well.
Overall, I like “Tantric Sex for Busy Couples”, but at points, I was just afraid of even attempting any of this since it seems like such difficult work just for sex. At times, the authors seem a bit too spiritual for me to even compare, and it makes me wary to even try. However, all of the information is in here if I did feel the urge to want to try, and it’s all presented in an easy-to-understand manner that would make trying Tantric sex a whole less scary.
