Very few sensations compare to the enjoyment of making love. Sex is a sensation unto itself, but there are moments where it can feel a bit stale. Whether you are dating a new man, or simply looking to spice up your tired sexual routine with your long-term partner, there are ways to make even the standard sex acts new and exciting. You might not be ready to jump straight into the “handcuffs” and “blindfolds” – and that’s okay. Consider some of these slightly-kinky suggestions to ease yourself into the idea of kinkier sex – and go further if you want. Or don’t if you don’t. That’s the beauty of sexual experimentation – you only have to do what feels fun for you!
1. Don’t be afraid to ask for what you want
For some people, speaking out in the bedroom can be tough, but your partner may find it incredibly sexy when you can share your fantasies and your needs. Whether you are canoodling before the act or you’re in the middle of sex, don’t be afraid to share your desires. How do you expect to have the best sex ever if your partner doens’t know what “the best sex ever” even includes?
2. Make Eye Contact
The eyes are the window to the soul, and there is no sultrier a moment to lock eyes than while you are going down on your partner. Look up, make sure they see you, and keep doing what you’re doing. It is an easy way to take an ordinary blowjob from average to extraordinary.
3. Take the Lead
If you are normally submissive, surprise your lover by taking control of your bedroom activities. Most people love it when their partner takes charge – and they get to be the lazy one and lay back and just enjoy the pleasure. Whether it’s something as simple as being the aggressor during a make-out session or you want to be on-top during sex, taking the lead can offer new possibilities for sex.
4. Vibrators Aren’t Only for Solo Play
Bust out the vibrator next time you are playing in the bedroom. While they are a great tool for solo orgasms, they can also be used to bring your duet action to new heights. Use a bullet to stimulate his shaft while you go down on a penis, or let your partner have control of the vibrator to bring you to orgasm using your favorite sex toy with the wonders of technology.
5. Masturbate In Front of Them
Masturbating in front of your partner might seem like a weird way to turn them on, but what partner doesn’t like to see their partner enjoying themselves? You can keep it simple by just playing with yourself, or pull out all the stops and let it lead into penetration. Whatever you feel like doing, you should do.
6. Grind Slow While You are On Top
Your hips don’t lie, and moving them during sex ensures they don’t. When you are on top, try grinding your hips against your partner. Hip movements are erotic, and the sensations and the view partner together for a potent erotic cocktail. There is more than simple thrusting for penetration, and you can use this to your advantage.
7. Ask Them about Their Fantasies
All people want to feel desired and loved. They also want to know that you care about what they like. Ask your partner to jot down his top 5 fantasies. Take a look at his interests, and try to find a way that they could fit into your own pleasure profile. Do they want to watch as you strip during amateur night at the local strip club? Well, maybe that one isn’t within your comfort level, but you’d be willing to hop onto the (sturdy, please!) living room coffee table for a private strip tease while they sit on the couch.
8. Use Your Hands
Once you and your partner get used to having intercourse, the days of handjobs and slipping a hand up someone’s skirt might fall by the wayside. It doesn’t have to though! Not only does manual stimulation offer the flexibility of way more positions, but it’s something that can be done in public – or when one of you isn’t feeling like full-intercourse.
9. Don’t Forget the Perineum
The perineum is the sensual spot between your partner’s genitals and their anus. It is full of nerve endings – no matter the gender. Rub gently and caress the spot as your partner gets close to orgasm for an out-of-this-world experience. Some people, however, are uncomfortable with touches in this area, so it will depend on your partner.
10. Slip a Condom on with Your Mouth
While more of an erotic visual than a useful technique, it can be hot to watch a partner apply to condom in this unconventional manner. For the beginner, you might want to try using your hands for a bit of help. Keep your lips close to the penis as you apply the condom, and as your hand rolls down the condom, follow the condom with your lips for a “faux” mouth application.