BDSM Advice Series: Pet Play

February 15th, 10   •   Posted by Mistress Kay   •   27 Comments

Pet play is the act of pretending to be an animal or taking on animal-like tendencies. It isn’t usually used for arousal purposes although some do use it that way. It usually is just used as a way to escape from regular life responsibilities. If you are a cute, snuggly kitty, you don’t have to pay the bills or clean the sink – you can just relax and focus on being a little mindless pet.

People who like pet play usually like to pretend to be a kitty or a puppy. I’ve heard of people pretending to be fish or geckos, but I’ll mostly just be covering kittens and puppies. Some people like to play ponies, but since those require a different and stricter training process, I will just be sticking to puppy and kitty play in this article.

While I could focus on the pet’s actual experience as the pet and surrounding issues, I will actually be focusing more on the Dominant’s side of the issue. For example, safety issues when your pet is in their mindset, how to keep their mindset, what to do to amuse them, and great ways to find accessories and clothing that will help complete the fantasy.

Safety Issues
The mind is really your only tool when it comes to pet play. Without the person believing they are the pet, they will not be able to get into the role. However, when a person is actually in their role, it is a common fact that many people have a problem thinking clearly. As their partner/friend/etc., you need to watch over your pet to make sure they don’t get themselves into trouble. The mind is so powerful that your partner/friend/etc. can actually start to believe they are a puppy/kitty and get themselves into trouble they’d know specifically not to when out of the head space.

If the role is played enough, it’s also possible for the pet to slip into the mindset at inappropriate times. To avoid this, I recommend a strict “code” that allows your pet to know when it’s time to slip into the mindset. For example, when having your partner be a ‘pet’, always slip their pet collar around their neck and pat their head with “Good kitty/puppy”. That will allow them to know that the scene has started. To end it, take off their collar, and go “That’s enough insert name here“. It allows enough break between fantasy and reality to keep it safe.

How to Get Started
First off, a lengthy discussion is needed between the two of you. In order for pet play to work, you need to have one person who wants to play as the pet and the other who would like to own a human pet. Without both of those pieces, you won’t have a very successful time. You want both partners to also agree on what they expect out of the play time. Does the kitty/puppy want to just lounge around and be pet-like and ignored, or do they want your attention the entire time in the way of petting and playing? Does the owner want the kitty to make themselves known the entire time or just to let the kitty/puppy run around the house? What about messes? Bathroom?

Images from buycostumes.com

The next step is to figure out your pet’s persona. Does your pet want to be a husky? A golden retriever? A persian? A tabby cat? Do they have any specific idea in mind? Also, do they have any specific name in mind? Many pets have a name they’d prefer to be called. If they don’t, do you want to make one up on the spot, or would you prefer to “take” your kitten/puppy home and see how their personality tranforms before you name them?

It’s really amazing, actually, how much a person’s personality will change when they are a pet. When they assume that role, they will be taking on a different personality as well. A serious girlfriend may turn into a playful and rambunctious kitten. A quiet husband may turn into a puppy that loves to make his presense known. The journey in itself is amazing.

You also will want to agree on a way for the pet to let you know that they’re ready to come out of their pet space. Maybe they should tug on a shoe lace or maybe gently nibble on your calves? It’s the way for them to tell you that they’re content and happy, but they’re just done for the day.

After you’ve discussed the preliminaries (and looked over the detail questions below), agree upon a safeword. It should be something unrelated to play, possibly even the word “safeword” itself. That word, being spoken by either partner, means that the play needs to stop. Maybe the kitten, upon being swatted for being bad, starts to feel horribly and wants to stop play. Maybe the owner finds that they are feeling uncomfortable with their partner being a pet. Either way, it’s an agreed-upon way to instantly stop what is happening.

After your safeword, you really are ready to play. As the Dominant partner, you really are in charge of the scene. Make sure you really do treat them as a pet – especially if they brought this up in the first place. Make use of the toys that you have and play with your kitty. Pet them if they do well. Find a treat (if they like chocolate, I recommend a small Hershey’s chocolate piece. You know, those bars that come with pre-cut seams to break them apart? Just give them one of the broken pieces.) to reward them if they do well. Let your pet curl up at your feet if that’s what they want. In fact, you could take the blankets off the bed and fold them into a square on the floor for a “pet” bed. Either way, make your pet play unique to you. Every couple has their own idea of pet play – make it something that is pleasurable for the both of you, and don’t forget to respect your partner’s safeword and limits.

Details
When it comes to puppy play or kitten play, you want to think out your details before allowing your partner to enter the role. You want to have all of your ideas already planned out, so you won’t be faced with any surprises. Also, if your kitty/puppy knows some things are off-limits or must be done as a kitten, then you have managed to increase the intensity of their headspace.

The first detail you should focus on is the idea of movement. Most people prefer to be on their hands and knees as a pet, and that’s also what will increase their headspace. However, talk to your partner because your partner may have knees or back problems that will make it uncomfortable for them to be on their knees for extended periods of time.

The second detail you should hammer out is the idea of furniture. Does your pet get to be on the furniture to curl up next to you? Should they stay on the floor only?

The third detail is punishment. If your pet isn’t allowed the furniture and crawls up anyway, what are you going to do? (Punishment is certainly something you need to discuss with your partner in advance as well. You may find it hot to hit your puppy on the nose with a newspaper, but they may just get downright pissed off.) Does it involved taking away their “food”? Do they get stuck in a little gate, or, if you’re playing with large equipment, in their cage?

What about how they learn? Does your kitty come home “new” and have to learn by trial and error, or do you tell her human-self the rules and expect her to follow them as a puppy/kitty?

What about vocalization? Is your puppy/kitty allowed to talk if they need something? Will they be punished if they do talk? Do they just have to learn how to give you subtle clues to get what they want? You will specifically want to discuss what they should do if they need to use the bathroom.

What about garbage or making messes? We all know that puppies love to get into the trash and kitties end up clawing and knocking things over at every chance. Is that out of bounds or acceptable?

Another big detail is food. If your puppy/kitty likes cereal, I actually recommend placing a pet bowl on the floor filled with Cocoa Puffs as well as a bowl for water. I really don’t recommend feeding your pet actual pet food unless it is agreed upon in advanced. It’s just not that tasty. If they don’t like cereal, there really are plenty of things that look like pet food – you just have to look around your local grocery store.

A big detail that many don’t want to think about is the bathroom. If you will allow your pet to come out of their headspace and use the human toilet, that’s fine. If you want to take it to a farther level, I know some people who require their pets to kneel on all fours in the bathtub and urinate there. When they’re done, the owner will wipe them and rinse out the tub. (Obviously, for anything other than urination, they are allowed the toilet.) If that’s something you’re comfortable with, that’s good. If not, you can just allow the human toilet. However, I don’t recommend lying down newspaper or those “doggie training” pads. They won’t absorb the large amount of human urine compared to baby pets. Since this is such a personal matter, I also recommend you ask your partner about their preference on it. If they were expecting to use the toilet, and you spring a “use the bathtub” on them in play, it will destroy the entire scene.

Image from EdenFantasys.com

Also go over any other details you think are important to your personal play. You want to have thought out all of your bases before you do any play. If you think your partner may have a differing opinion than your own, you may want to bring them into the discussion and ask their opinion as well.

Accessories
Pet play can be as expensive as you want it to be. There are plenty of great stores that sell human-specific pet play items. However, if this is something you’re experimenting with and don’t have an attachment to it quite yet, I don’t recommend buying such expensive items.

First off: Your costume. Kitten costumes are so much easier than puppy ones. Around Halloween, just go visit your local costume store. There’s tons of kitten ears and tails there. For puppies, I recommend buying a headband (available in most mass-retailer’s hair section) and just sewing two little pieces of fabric to it to make your ears. Or, if you have a “husky” or other pointy-eared puppy, kitten ears would actually work for them as well. There’s also a really cute costume at this website for cheap if you don’t want to wait for Halloween.

Another option is the tails. You can either wear your tail on a belt, or they offer tails that come attached to buttplugs. For example, there’s a really popular butt-plug fox tail that you could buy here. (However, that’s a little out of your budget if you are trying to stay cheap.) There are also some kinksters on Fetlife that make tails and other kitten accessories custom-made if you are looking to have a specific tail/outfit made.

That should make up most of your outfit. You may also want to discuss whether your pet needs to be naked or if they can be dressed. Whether they just get underwear or if they can wear lingerie too.

When it comes to other play toys, I say go to a mass-retailer and find them there. You can find pet bowls really cheap, and if you want to personalize it, by a small thing of paint and a paintbrush, and paint their name on the bowl. You can also find a pet bowl placemat if you want one to increase the “real-ness” of it all.

A collar is also a consideration if your pet wants to have one around their neck. If you buy a “large” sized pet collar at a pet store, it should work, or you could consider buying a special “human” collar for this purpose. I actually own and recommend this cute Black Cat collar which you can buy right here.

You can also find toys there. You can find squeaky toys for your puppy, or feather toys or balls that jingle for your kitty. Either way, you should easily be able to make an entire outfit for your pet play for under $40. That’s including the toys and the clothing.

Have fun playing with your new “pet” and let me know if you have any questions. Either by comment here, or if you’re shy, I’m glad to answer/mentor through e-mail, so just ask. :) Everyone needs some place to start.

27 Comments on "BDSM Advice Series: Pet Play"

thepinkpoppet says...
February 20th, 2010

Although I have never practiced any form of pet-play and have no interest in doing so, I find your post here to be of great value to those that perhaps are entertaining the idea or just getting started in this. I will bookmark this to refer others to this if and when the subject comes up in the future. Thanks. ThePinkPoppet.
.-= thepinkpoppet´s last blog ..Are You Watching Me? (part 2) =-.

February 23rd, 2010

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February 23rd, 2010

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February 23rd, 2010

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February 23rd, 2010

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e[Lust] #8 « ThePinkPoppet says...
February 23rd, 2010

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e[lust] #8 : Tales from the Porn Store says...
February 23rd, 2010

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e[lust] #8 says...
February 24th, 2010

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February 24th, 2010

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February 24th, 2010

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February 24th, 2010

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e[lust] #8 « Hubman's Hangout says...
February 24th, 2010

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elust 8 — writingdirty says...
February 24th, 2010

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e[lust] #8 « Sweet Tart says...
February 24th, 2010

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e[lust]8 « The Bear's Lair says...
March 02nd, 2010

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E-lust 8 | Adele Haze's "Spanking Model Speaks" says...
March 04th, 2010

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e-lust 8 | The Spanking Writers says...
March 05th, 2010

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Lelah Hauke says...
October 05th, 2010

Each and every youngster is unique. what works for 1 will not work for another

Missin' Kitten says...
May 02nd, 2011

I am a fan of kitten play, and have been for awhile but I am unsure of how to go about finding a master. I moved not to long ago and though I have met a few people, they are more submissive than me. As my human self I am a dominant person, but my kitten self lets me get away from that for awhile, so how do I go about finding an owner?

October 13th, 2012

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June 28th, 2013

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