More people than ever are curious about exploring their kinky side. Thanks to Fifty Shades of Grey (whether you liked the movie or not), the discussion of BDSM and removing the taboo around sexual exploration are now in a full swing. If you’re someone who’s already well-acquainted with their kinky side, this is great news – chances are your dating circle of kinky partners will get expanded thanks to these trends.
On the other hand, online dating is a great way to connect with other people who share the same kinks as you. If you’re thinking about trying some dating websites or apps, it will allow you to find more like-minded people. However, even though you’ll gain access to a lot of potential matches, it will still be hard to find someone you truly connect with. With that in mind, here are the five tips to successfully date online while kinky.
Be upfront on your dating profile
If you really want to find someone who is into the same kinks as you, then you’re going to need to put your kinks out there. This doesn’t mean that your profile needs, “I love being whipped until my ass bleeds” written all over it if you enjoy spanking. Your goal isn’t to scare people off; it’s to give them an idea of what you’re into and let them decide for themselves if they enjoy that kink or not. You can be upfront without being intimidating.
In addition, the amount of information you give on your dating profile should depend on the type of relationship you’re looking for. If you’re looking for a casual relationship, providing more detail about your kinks will show others that you’re more sex-focused. However, if you’re looking for something serious, then you shouldn’t give too much detail on your sexual preferences. So, yes, be upfront with what you’re looking for, but you need to decide how much detail you want to give.
Be honest about your kinks from the beginning
You may be nervous to mention your kinks on your dating profile. Not everyone is feeling comfortable making their sexual preferences public. If you don’t feel comfortable talking about your kinks online, that’s fine. But you’re going to have to bring it up eventually. Whether you’re talking to a potential date online or going on a date, you should bring the topic up when you feel the moment is right.
Now, you don’t know the sexual preferences of the other person, so you need to be careful. If your date is someone vanilla, they may not understand why you wear a chastity belt or diaper. Finding out if they’re open to exploring sex is a great start. By knowing how open-minded they are, you’ll be able to see whether or not you’re comfortable enough to discuss your kink.
Use the right dating websites
You can use conventional dating websites like OkCupid or Tinder. However, to make the entire process easier, it’s best to use dating websites which are specific for your kink. If you’re really focused on meeting someone who shares the same kink as you, there are plenty of dating websites which will help you connect with other kinksters. This will quicken the process and weed out vanilla people. You don’t have to have the awkward conversation or subtly hint to them about your kink. By using a kink-specific dating website, you both know immediately what you prefer sexually.
There’s more to you than just kink
If you’re looking for more than casual sex and you’re using a conventional dating website, don’t let your kink get in the way. For vanilla people, they’ll probably focus on talking about your kink because it’s something new for them. But this takes away from getting to know you as a person. Rather, now your kink is a highlight for them. Instead, you can make your life a little easier by going on dating sites where people share your kink. That way, you can both focus on getting to know each other.
Expect rejection
Whether you’re on a conventional dating site or one that’s kink-focused, you’re going to face rejection. It’s completely normal. Even if someone shares the same kink as you, they may not like you and that’s okay. What’s important is that you don’t take it personally. Dating is all about finding the right person, and it takes a while until you really connect with someone on an emotional and physical level.
You may think that dating with a kink is impossible, but you’re living in a time where meeting people has never been easier. Of course, when you’re dating online, you’re going to experience rejection and meet a lot of frogs along the way. However, if you choose the right dating platforms, you’ll be able to connect with people who share your interests, in and out of the bedroom.
