The shower is my Mistress. Water, really. When I tend to get update, I just jump in the shower and turn the heat up until it burns. Until my skin flushes red with the water. Until I scortch some parts of my body. I’d much rather prefer to play with my sub, to be violent just to get it out of me, but he never seems to ever want to play when I’m upset. In fact, he actually doesn’t even appear to want anything to do with me right now.
My body is stiff. My burnt leg is actually pumped with that muscle acid. It’s an odd feeling. I feel relieved, but given the chance, I’d still play with my sub. Once again, he is laying on the balcony though and it looks like he wants nothing to do with me.
Tonight was just a bad night. I just don’t do well with groups. Especially groups where I don’t feel like I fit in. Which is sad when it’s a BDSM group in the first place. I just feel like I’m not attractive enough to be there, not social enough. But I want friends. So it doesn’t make sense.
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